fWe live in a modernist society that lives by putting its own moralistic laws, which in the end incline humanity towards perversion and seek to destroy God’s original design about marriage. One of the big questions is: what should marriage be like? The world says many things about that, about each one’s role in the home, and the more everything has been modernized, one has wanted to divert each one’s role, yes, this even within our churches.
Modern society constantly redefines concepts such as identity, authority, responsibility, and family. These redefinitions are often presented as progress, freedom, or personal fulfillment, yet many of them contradict the principles established by God in Scripture. As a result, confusion arises not only in the world but also among believers who struggle to reconcile biblical teaching with cultural pressure.
Marriage, according to the Bible, is not a social invention nor a cultural agreement, but a divine institution created by God Himself. From the very beginning, God established marriage as the union between a man and a woman, with complementary roles designed to reflect His order, love, and purpose. When society attempts to redefine these roles, the harmony of the home is often disrupted.
The first thing is that a really Christian marriage must be governed by the Word of God, and the Bible speaks to us enough on the subject and at the same time contrasts with Christ and his church, and is the best example that we can really take to take marriages healthy.
The relationship between Christ and the church is the highest model of love, sacrifice, unity, and mutual respect. In this relationship, Christ leads with love, gives Himself completely, and seeks the well-being of His people. Likewise, the church responds with trust, obedience, and devotion. This divine pattern serves as the foundation for understanding the roles within marriage.
What is the role of man in a home?
The role of man in the home is that of a “leader”, but not that of a tyrant, but just as Christ is the leader and the very head of his church:
But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.
1 Corinthians 11:3
Biblical leadership is radically different from the authoritarian models promoted either by toxic masculinity or by distorted interpretations of Scripture. God does not call men to dominate, intimidate, or silence their wives. Instead, He calls them to lead through service, humility, responsibility, and love.
A husband who understands that Christ is his own head will naturally approach leadership with reverence and accountability. He knows that his authority is not absolute, but delegated by God. Therefore, every decision, every action, and every word must be guided by love, wisdom, and submission to Christ.
This is not at all attached to the modernist and macho idea that man must be an ogre in the home, and that he is the only one who must make decisions as if the woman is a zero to the left. Therefore, this authority should not be interpreted in the sense of superiority, but with love, just as Christ loved his holy church:
25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
26 That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word,
Ephesians 5:25-26
Christ’s love for the church was sacrificial, patient, and selfless. He did not seek His own benefit, but the redemption and growth of His people. In the same way, a husband is called to place the well-being of his wife above his own comfort, pride, or preferences.
Christ loved the church in a great way, with delicacy, sincerity, dedication, giving his own life for the same, and in that same way every husband should love his wife.
This kind of love creates security, trust, and emotional stability in the home. When a wife knows she is loved, valued, and protected, submission becomes a natural response rather than an imposed obligation.
And this of assuming leadership as men also means that man is the main provider of the home.
Being the provider does not only refer to financial provision, but also to spiritual, emotional, and moral leadership. A husband is called to ensure that his home is guided by biblical principles, prayer, and integrity. Even when both spouses work, the responsibility of provision remains a defining role of the man according to Scripture.
What is the role of women?
The role of women cannot be the same as the role of men. The woman is not head of the home. This must be submitted to man, but so that the word “submit” is not misunderstood, it is good that we have understood well the role of man, that he is not a tyrant or superior to women, but that he is the leader God chose so that be head of the home just as Christ is of the church.
Biblical submission has been one of the most misunderstood and criticized concepts in modern society. Many associate submission with oppression or inferiority, but Scripture presents it as an act of trust, order, and harmony within God’s design.
Submission does not mean silence, lack of opinion, or intellectual inferiority. On the contrary, the Bible presents women as wise, capable, discerning, and influential within the home. Submission is about recognizing and respecting God’s established order, not about diminishing value. The apostle Paul’s orders for women are as follows:
22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
23 For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body.
24 Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing.
Ephesians 5:22-24
The woman must show respect towards the man just as the man must respect the woman. And this to submit does not mean that the opinion of the woman will not be valid, which in key would be that the word of the man would be like that of the king.
Biblical marriage is not a dictatorship but a partnership with distinct roles. A wise husband listens to his wife, values her counsel, and considers her perspective. A wise wife supports her husband, respects his leadership, and contributes actively to the unity of the home.
This is not the order, the order is that the woman submits to the man as leader, and that the man imitates Christ in regard to the treatment he gives to his church.
When both roles are exercised according to God’s design, marriage becomes a place of peace, growth, and mutual edification rather than competition or conflict.
In conclusion. Man is the home provider, this is his role in every sense of the word:
But if any provide not for his own, and specially for those of his own house, he hath denied the faith, and is worse than an infidel.
1 Timothy 5:8
This strong statement emphasizes the seriousness of responsibility within the home. God takes the care of the family seriously, and He expects men to assume that responsibility with diligence and commitment.
The woman must fulfill roles of care, home organization, because the Bible says that the wise woman builds her house.
A woman’s influence in the home is profound. Through wisdom, care, and discernment, she contributes to the emotional and spiritual climate of the household. Her role is not limited or diminished, but essential to the strength and stability of the family.
This does not mean that the woman cannot work outside the home or that the man should not help in the things of the house, all this can be done, but it is always good to distinguish the role of each one in the home.
In the midst of a modern society that seeks to blur distinctions and redefine God’s design, Christian marriages are called to be a living testimony of biblical truth. When husbands and wives embrace their God-given roles with love, humility, and mutual respect, marriage becomes a powerful reflection of Christ and His church, bringing glory to God and stability to the family.